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Lots of love........but, there are some haters too.

by rere
(washington, dc)

Ladies,

FYI: Always be proud of the fact that you can and do ride your own. I have been riding a little over 3 months now and have mostly gotten lots of good for you and you go girls when I stop at lights, signs etc, but you do, and I have seen first hand the envy on some womens faces when I pull up beside them. I have heard it's not lady like and I would never risk my life like that. It use to bother me and take away some of my confidence.

And don't get me started on the way some women act when I pull up or walk into someplace with my gear and their guys are looking at me and asking me about my bike.

If eyes could shoot daggers, I'd be dead. I guess I did not know riding would bring me such mixed emotions from people who I don't even know. Now I don't even care about it anymore. I now see that it's just their own insecurity they are trying to pass on to me.So, I figure the ones who cheer me on are wonderful secure women who love seeing other women do their thing and the ones who snarl at me will be the ones trying to learn how to ride next season.

Comments for Lots of love........but, there are some haters too.

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Oct 31, 2011
Thanks, Cathy!
by: Anonymous

Thanks for the encouragement, Cathy! I just signed up with a meetup group in my area for female riders. They very much welcome new riders, and even assign mentors for the newbies on group rides. I look forward to meeting friends there and talk as much as I want about motorcycle without any male patronizing/mocking me :)

Oct 31, 2011
Not so much love
by: Cathy

Wow, your hubby?s friends are a bit hectic ? it sounds a little like they?re not feeling comfortable with you being a ?peer?, as the one guy put it. I think men just need to understand that motorbikes are not exclusively males? domains any more, and they should rather embrace the change, and enjoy the new company, not make snide comments. I wonder what size bike they all first started riding on ? probably something smaller than yours?!!

I?m so glad, though, that it?s not putting you off, and it really isn?t about the bike ? it?s about what you?re happy doing! Just keep ignoring them, and if your hubby?s not happy with the so-called ?man? effect, buy yourself a pretty pink scarf to wear when riding!!!!! ;)

RE BikXhi below, thanks so much for your comments, you made me feel great! Yeah, it is fun hanging with the guys ? and/or ladies ? I just wish everyone could chill and enjoy the company ? whoever they?re riding with, and drop the agendas.

Oct 30, 2011
I'm not feeling the love
by: Anonymous

Had an argument with my hubby recently about how I changed into a "man" since I bought my bike almost 2 months a go. and he thinks I'm such a tomboy, only wearing jeans and not acting like a "regular" female. I am not sure where this all coming from. He used to love it when I was his passenger, I wasn't wearing skirts then?

We went for a long ride on our own motorcycles a couple of weeks a go, it was our first time riding together, and it's so much fun. So what is the problem??!

I asked his rider friend about it, and he said that I'm now a "peer" not a passenger anymore. So it changes the dynamic. Such BS.

Than this same friend made fun of me, when I was so proudly told everyone that I got my first biker greeting on the road. I said "someone was giving me the peace sign" and this guy arrogantly said "it's not a peace sign. It means 2 wheels on the road". Yea smart ass, I know it's not a peace sign...I just thought it's easier to describe it that way.

Another friend of my hubby made fun of my bike, since it's a small 250cc he called it a "scooter", which I don't really care...I mean, yea...it's small and not a rocket, but I love my bike. He also said "hope one day you can go faster than the parking lot speed".

What's wrong with these people? Why can't they just be happy for me? It's not easy learning to ride all by yourself.

Their comments don't discourage me from riding, in fact I want to ride more just to prove to these guys that I'm serious about riding. I'm just sad that I have to go through this exciting time alone.

I'm glad we have this forum, so I can read and share my experiences with you girls. Thanks for reading!! S

Oct 03, 2011
Lots of Love here..
by: BikXhi

I'm sure there's haters out there, but I haven't ran into them yet. Been riding for 4 months and all female peers, co-workers, you name it.. have been all about girl power.

And the guys... they have been nothing but supportive. Except for the salesBOY at the motorcycle store that gave my fiance a realllllly sexist comment about me. But that doesn't matter, he's a nobody, so, so far i've only had lots of love.

RE: Cathy (below)
Geez that GIRL should I say is a B! She almost ruined your 24 years of marriage too, my oh my.. what an attention hogger. I'll admit, its pretty fun to hang with the guys, but I would LOVE to have female companions joining my group. I don't NEED or WANT to be the center of attention. Just do your thang and keep your head up.

Sep 22, 2011
Mostly encouraging
by: Cathy

On the whole, I?ve found almost everyone to be enthusiastic and encouraging about my starting to ride my own bike just over a year ago. The older generation, as well as people who?ve never been on a bike themselves, tend to be concerned, and I just understand that they don?t really understand what it?s all about at all, and that?s OK ? they?ve not been over critical, or tried to stop me.

The interesting thing is that only one person has ever been totally discouraging about me starting to ride, and that was another woman rider! Her dismissiveness and veiled discouragement were quite startling, especially as she?d been given all the support and encouragement she could want when she started riding, about two years before I did. Turned out, I eventually learned, that the truth is that she just does not like the idea of another female rider around ? she?d far rather have the group of guys she rides with all to herself ? and that included my husband! The idea that he would no longer be riding with them without me around, well, lets just say that she threw an absolute hissy-fit, and behaved like a brat, and this after she very nearly broke up my marriage of 24 yrs.

Needless to say we don't see her any more, but I still carry the hurt and lack of trust with me wherever I go, but every time I ride my bike, I can mentally show her the finger! May not be nice of me, but it makes me feel better!!!

Thank goodness there are so many other lady riders out there who are great company, are encouraging and supportive. I salute you all!!

Sep 21, 2011
Ditto
by: Dottie

I rode on back with hubby until this year. I got my own Harley. I have a Heritage Softail Classic, I have heard that I was nuts to start out on a bike that big, it worked out fine. I have had every comment imaginable, some bad but mostly good. I just mostly let the bad roll off my shoulders. I didn't start riding my own for anyone but me. What they think is really of no matter to me. Some are jealous, some are proud of me, some just have to say something regardless, what is the old saying " why is it the people with the smallest minds have the biggest mouths?" lol. So true. Just keep on riding, enjoy what it means to you. I love it, and have no intention of quitting. Thanks for a great thread.

Dottie

Sep 21, 2011
envy
by: Lynn - FL

I read a wonderful quote recently: "What other people think of me is none of my business." That's how I feel and I love it!

Sep 21, 2011
Nice topic!!!
by: Gogo

Yes....to all that posted a commet, this is
all info I myself enjoyed reading. My husband
still preferes me to ride with him on his m/c.
So....when will I get a break? I love riding
my own Sporty?....Why do I feel I have to prove
my self independent. I so hate the remarks from
(some men)....oh you must ride a sportster?
.....ugg!!! Why do they try to snub me? Some
women whom I know don't ride, say things like
I like this bike better or I prefer that bike
better???....so why don't they ride and keep
their negative comments to them selves. I try
not to fall into their levels....I just don't
like it and am so tired of their storys....like
back in my days.....bla bla blah!!!...ok sorry
folks, I just had to vent? = ) sigh

Sep 21, 2011
Do what is right for you.
by: Wanda

I do what is right for me, and I do not care what other people think or say. I have found that mindset to be very liberating.

Sep 20, 2011
Hubby's buddy was a hater
by: Dawn

Yeah, my hubby's buddy was the one who gave me the most crap. I went too slow to keep up with the "Harley Boys", wouldn't go on the freeways etc. I just ruined the ride they would have had. I heard, "can't you just ride on the back today?" so many times I can't count. Never in front of the hubby though.

But guess what, we went out one day with a bigger group, and it included a couple other women. He ended up being the odd man out. I even volunteered to park my bike so I wouldn't hold everyone up, but I was WAY out voted. Everyone else was happy to stick to the back roads, and it wasn't just for me. Everyone was so nice an supportive, he ended up looking like a jerk. And we had a wonderful ride that day.

Needless to say, now that my skills are a little better, hubby doesn't mind riding with me any more and the buddy has been moved to 2nd string.

I still hop on the back sometimes, but it's because I want to sight see or snuggle, not because I feel like I HAVE to.

You have to get a bit of a thick skin, because there is still a lot of work to do to dispel the "biker" stereotype of druggie, tattoo covered hell raisers. And until you can ride without being lumped with the "bikers" there will be looks.

But welcome to the club!

Sep 20, 2011
Be PROUD
by: Rob

I have been riding solo for about 6 years now. I do however like to jump on the back of his bike, but it's not often.

I don't think I have gotten any negative reactions, if I have.. well I don't stay in one place long enough while on my motorcycle to notice.

The "haters" well that's just what they are, haten that YOU are doing something they can't.

So be proud and hold your head up HIGH while out on the road!

Ride Safe!

Rob

Sep 20, 2011
YES!
by: AdriAwesomepants

I was recently talking to my girlfriend who rides and has been riding for a while as well as my husband to try to figure it out.

I get lots of "go girls," but my problem has been more with girls who ride b*tch. I understand riding a motorbike is fun... that's why I learned to do it, just don't hate because I'm doing it solo and your on the back of a man's.

Glad to read there are other girls out there who are letting the haters hate and keep rocking their own bikes. :)

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