The Road Trip from Hell

by Melissa
(Vancouver, BC)

The four women packed their bags carefully, gassing up their motorcycles for what they hoped would be the road trip of a lifetime. They planned several stops on the way, seeing little roadside attractions and eating at little diners and dives. They would video themselves in different locations and would send postcards to one another from each of their stops, giving each other a tangible reminder when they returned home. What could be better?

Just after leaving a little, retro looking town, one of the bikes makes a coughing, gagging sound and chugs to a stop alongside the road. All four women reach in their pockets for their cell phones only to find out that there are no bars in this area, nothing, zip, zilch, nada.

Plan B: Two sit with their bikes while the other two ride back to the little town to see if there is anyone who can repair the bike. While they are gone, the other two tinker around and actually get the bike going once again. Excited, they hop on their bikes and head to the town to catch their friends. What they find out though is that since there was no one in the town that could help right away, the two women had gone to one of two other little towns a little further up the road. At first the other two think about splitting up but decide it is a bad idea. They make it to one of the towns but their friends are not there. Eventually they do find each other and start back on their trip.

On the second day, while sitting around a campfire, the four start talking about past affairs and boyfriends when two of the long-standing friends find out that they had a boyfriend in common. A quick discussion about the timeline reveals that the boyfriend was seeing them both at the same time. Pouting, both women stomp off to go to sleep. In the morning, things seem better, although there are several pointed comments between the two.

The four women set off for more of their trip. They come upon a little carnival, filled with arts and crafts and delicious smelling food. Later that night, two of the women find themselves sick beyond sick. For the next two days, the four women end up in a hotel, their bikes parked outside in the summer sun while inside a non-descript room two healthy gals take care of two very unhealthy ones. Finally the sickies throw up everything but the kitchen sink and feel up to heading home.

As they set off to head back to their homes that morning, it starts raining a drizzly, fine rain that sends them searching for shelter every ten miles or so. They finally make it home, tired, wet and droopy. It was the road trip from hell but if you ask any one of them a few years from now, no one will remember that at all.